Give a special someone a disease this Valentine’s Day

Candy or plush bears are such predictable Valentine’s Day gift. Imagine the look on your sweetheart’s when they open the box to find–surprise!–you’ve given them gonorrhea. These little guys are giant versions of venereal diseases, and we’ve also got chlamydia, herpes, and syphilis, too.

If your S.O. doesn’t have much of a sense of humor, we’ve also got cute little sperm and egg.

June 15 = Cheer Up Keanu Reeves Day

On June 15th, we plan on sending letters, emails, gifts, and any other niceties and kind words to a real bro, Keanu Reeves. Keanu has come on some tough times lately, and doesn’t seem to have the same youthful lust for life as he did even ten years ago. Please participate in Cheer Up Keanu Day, and hopefully bring a smile to Keanu Reeves’ face.
In case you don’t know, Keanu’s sister Kim was diagnosed with leukemia many years ago. If you want to make a more significant gift, consider donating to a cancer research charity in the name of Cheer Up Keanu Day. I’m sure a letter or email informing Keanu of this action would really make his day. Check out Cell Science for a nice directory of cancer charities around the world that you may donate (or even volunteer your time) to.
http://www.cellscience.com/CANCharities.html

Current Contact Info:
Mail to:
Keanu Reeves c/o Jimmy Darmody
2000 Avenue of the Stars
Los Angeles, CA 90067

Agents:
Jimmy Darmody
Phone: 424-288-2000
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
Phone: 310-888-3200

Invite your friends, and anyone who has enjoyed any of Keanu’s roles on film or stage, and let’s make this June 15th the happiest for Mr. Reeves.

More sad Keanu after the jump.
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